O Drakanada
by Aguamenta
Summary: The tale of how Drakken used his weather machine to build a kingdom.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own Kim Possible, I think Disney does. In addition the flag acting as a cover is taken from the same show, so I don't own it. The anthem, I do own, having dedicated much time and effort to it. Stephan Harper is a legitimate person and before anyone gets angry, I'm Canadian, so in my mind I may mock my country. Obviously I'm proud of where I come from, but there's no fun without a little sarcasm and joking.

**Dedication: **To my sister, who helped me write the anthem, and therefore helped inspired the story.

'Now I have the power to take Canada by storm,' stated Drakken, an evil smirk on his face.

'Why Canada anyway?' His sidekick questioned, looking slightly confused.

'High literacy rate, good health care and sparkling clean cities,' Drakken smiled.

'Since when do you care?'

'All of which will be my evil kingdom when I name it Drakanada!' Drakken exclaimed, as he pulled out a flag with his face centred between two vertical red bars.

'That rolls off the tongue,' Shego stated sarcastically. 'Have you ever stopped to think that an ice storm might not be the best way to go about this?'

'Hmm, what?' The evil doctor snapped as he started hammering a button.

'Canada is a cold place. They're used to ice tempests,' Shego explained rolling her eyes and continuing her search for the manual. 'Maybe the manual's in this compartment here.'

Drakken continued to hammer on the button before scowling at her. 'One, we don't need the manual! Two.'

Before he could complete the list it began to rain inside the weather machine. Lightning flashed as Drakken pulled Shego into a hug. By the end of the sudden storm, the cockpit was full of water. Shego pulled a string down, causing the water to flow out of the control room.

'Ahem, maybe the manual would be a good idea,' stuttered Drakken.

'Gee, you think?' Shego muttered, rolling her eyes.

'Anyway,' she continued as she searched for the instructions, 'wouldn't it be better to start a drought of some sort?'

'Why? Who would surrender in the face of a drought? A terrifying tempest of ice and snow will bring them to their knees!' Drakken shouted, drawing himself to his full height.

Shego shook her head, 'Yeah, the manual isn't here. So we won't be bringing anyone to their knees quite yet.'

Drakken let out a roar of frustration and shouted, 'Shego get me that manual!'

Once the manual had been stolen and another lake sucked into the belly of the weather machine Drakken laid out the steps to achieve domination of Canada.

'Step one; suck the lake into the compression tank. Step two; generate a very big storm the likes of which no one has ever seen. Step three, conquer Canada!' He gloated.

'Okay, two questions. One wouldn't it be best to cause mass dehydration? Two, what happens to the fish?'

Drakken gaped at her, 'the fish?'

'Mhm, the fish in the water that we're sucking up.'

'They go somewhere, that isn't important! What is important is you're questioning my evil scheme!' Drakken exclaimed, looking both angry and hurt.

'No, not questioning, merely pointing out an improvement,' replied Shego, her tone a mixture of sincerity and sarcasm which placated Drakken.

'Well, your idea has merit. We shall take all their water and wait for a time. If they don't surrender, which I expect, then we unleash the storm!'

'Let's go get some water,' stated Shego, with little enthusiasm.

A few days later governments began receiving complaints and concerns over the dry lakes, rivers, and streams. The smallest ponds had been drained. Not only that, but no clouds loomed. The sun shone hot and bright. Not only was there no water to drink, but there were no fish to eat and no crops would grow.

'What should we do?!' Canadians cried. 'We can't afford to remove salt from the ocean! Nor can we buy bottled water! The world has lost 25% of its fresh water reserves.'

Drakken and Shego watched as the society fell into anarchy. Brother turned on brother and soon all bottled water had been drunk. Even those hiding out in bunkers were running low. Panic and chaos were rising. By January the Prime Minister was calling out the perpetrator of these terrible actions, as most no longer believed it was a freak weather accident. Best of all, at least for the super villains controlling Canada's water supply, Kim Possible had been rendered incapable of stopping them. A super virus had attacked her, keeping her bedridden. Her sidekick was unable to stop the weather machine and had retired to his home.

'And now we shall go to Stephan Harper,' proclaimed Drakken. 'He will relinquish all control to me and we will all sing O Drakanada! I knew this would work.'

'Of course,' snarled Shego, angry that Drakken had forgotten it was her plan that was currently throwing the 'true north strong and free' into unordered chaos.

The bulging weather machine arrived in Ottawa. The water starved people pointed up at it, gasping and whispering amongst themselves. Was this the machine that sucked up all the water? It hovered next to the parliament buildings and a blue man and green women strode off.

Stephan Harper hurried out to meet them, looking worn, pale and dirty. Of course no one had washed in weeks, saving the water for drinking.

'Are you the culprits?!' He exclaimed wildly, pointing his finger. 'You have brought this grand country down into the dust? Why?'

'I need a kingdom to rule!' Drakken shouted exuberantly. 'And I chose your country. Now hurry, before something ruins my moment. I will return your people the water if you all promise to acknowledge me as your king.'

Stephan Harper bit his lip. 'Under your rule will our high literacy rates be kept? What of our good health care?'

'I shall retain those practises,' stated Drakken proudly. 'As well as clean up the cities. My terms are that you never rise up. If you do so, I will take all your water and sell it to China.'

Stephan Harper glanced around at the small, desperate crowd. Many were thinner and the death toll had been high. Their eyes spoke of untold horror and a woman cried out, 'Give in! My baby must drink!' Others took up the call. There was nothing he could do but give into the blue man's demands.

'I don't know your name,' he began regally.

'Dr. Drakken,' interjected Drakken.

'Er, alright. Dr. Drakken you have tortured the soul of my country. The beavers have died and the dog sleds have no snow to run over. Igloos have yet to be built this year. My people are dying. Though we are a democracy and should vote, we cannot wait. Besides most MPs have fled, leaving just me. I feel it is my duty to relinquish my hold on the country, so we may live and see our water returned. I am putting the nation's fate in your hands. May our cities stay clean and our people alive and educated. Happiness would be good too,' he added hopefully.

'I thank you.' Drakken accepted his new position with a huge smile. 'Shego,' he shouted, 'return the people their water!'

A student looked up from his history book, watching as their blue bus popped in front of him. An image of the mighty Drakken adorned the front. The man, alongside his sidekick Shego, though no one mentioned her, had singlehandedly ruled his kingdom for many years. Shego was in charge of the media, something completely different from running the nation. Getting to school was now much faster and the cities had never been cleaner. Health care had been, well not improved by the great Drakken personally, but he had gotten some scientists to commit to Drakanada's health care system. Rumour had it he had threatened them with torture, though no intelligent person would believe such things. The bus continued its way around the city, where people happily drank water, which had been plentiful since Drakken had begun his rule. He swore it would continue to be as long as there were no uprisings.

The student got off at his school, thinking about the discussion he had overheard last night. His father, very much involved in, well not running the nation, but aiding Drakken in the momentous task, had hinted at a takeover of the USA. Rumour had it that Drakken's nemesis resided there and he was out for revenge. Which was understandable and Drakanada would stand behind him. The idea of taking over the states was one that was happily contemplated anyway. The USA hadn't helped what had been Canada in their time of need, merely offered to sell water at outrageous prices. Drakken may have taken the water, but he returned it and kept the country running and the people relatively safe. The people who questioned his leadership were obviously not included in such sentiments. They were nonexistent now anyway. Sure they had to pay to see Drakken's palace kept in good shape. But now they had water and cleanliness. It was a worthwhile trade to acquire such a worthy leader.

As a bell dinged, signalling the beginning of class, the student rose to his feet with all the others facing the blue, red and white flag and singing:

'O Drakanada

Our strong and worthy chief

True Drakken love

We follow his commands

His blue face

And tiny hands

Defeating Kim Possible

His evil plots

Oh Drakanada

He is the supreme one

Flooding our land

Glorious and blue

Oh Drakanada

He is the supreme one

Oh Drakanada

He is the supreme one'

**A/N** So this is quite different from everything else I've written, but I really enjoyed it. Also the anthem is to be sung to the tune of O Canada. It works, I promise. Hopefully any fellow Canadians who read this aren't offended. But honestly Drakken isn't so bad, at least when he's got Shego heading the propaganda department. I'm calling this finished for now, but one day I may write the tale of the battle with the USA. We'll see. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
